Surviving in Survival Mode

We all go through seasons of survival mode – whether it's health struggles, a big deadline at work, tons of extracurriculars all converging on the same month, or just a difficult season, there are times when we simply aren't at our best. And that's okay! Today we're chatting about how to survive when you find yourself in survival mode. We've all been there, so if that's where you find yourself today, I hope this episode encourages you with the truth that you can do this!

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Today we are talking about survival mode. A time when you feel like you are about to pull your hair out every single day. This can because you’re in a busy season, you or someone you care about may be facing health struggles, or maybe you’re facing deadlines at work. Tasha shares her suggestions on how to set goals and move forward when it feels like a struggle just to face the day.

THERE’S NO EASY FIX

We have all been there at different times in our life, feeling like we are just hanging on by a thread. And many times, this seems to be caused by circumstances beyond our control. You’re doing the bare minimum to get by and it seems there is no path forward to change your circumstances.

There are ways to navigate through this, but none of them are an easy fix. Survival mode is real and comes with real challenges and real struggles. The suggestions that follow are not a quick fix.

The truth is, no one knows what your battles look like or your unique story. Even if they did, there are so many things where no advice could get you out of the storm. Sometimes it just doesn’t work like that.

REDEFINING SUCCESS

What we are going to talk about is how to function on the days where you feel like you can barely function, and it starts with redefining success. The first part of that is acknowledging this is a hard season and there are things outside of our control right now.

We need to realize that a goal of getting out of the situation may not be possible. We may not be able to attain that. We may be setting ourselves up for failure. Of course, we may still desire that, but sometimes it can’t be the goal.

Consider a health struggle, such as one Laura has struggled with for several years. There are days where it’s really hard to do the normal things in life because of chronic illness and pain.

She has tried so many things such as special diets, medications, exercise, rest, this, that, and the other. Many of those things didn’t work. A lot of money was spent.

If success was defined only by reducing symptoms and not having the disease anymore, that was all out of her control. It was right to try all of those things because there is often a lot of trial and error when trying to find solutions to health struggles.

WHAT WE ARE PHYSICALLY ABLE TO DO

But the end goal should be determined by some of the things we can do in the circumstances we are in. The first question is what are you physically able to do?

And that question is harder to answer if your struggle is more emotional than physical. It’s a little harder to make the connection of having difficulty and feeling overwhelmed. You may need to limit a physical activity you used to do, even though your body is capable, your emotional limits may not allow for it.

It takes some introspection and some trial and error. Essentially we need to lower the bar for what we can accomplish each day so we can set ourselves up for success. Our goals need to be ones we can accomplish so that we can build a positive momentum.

THE DONE LIST

You are probably accomplishing more than you think you are. A trick you can try is making a done list. This is a list of what you have gotten done today.

Write it in a notebook or in a notes app on your phone. List everything you’ve done. Did you do a load of laundry? Make a return? Respond to emails? Clean the bathroom? Pick someone up from school? Write it down no matter big or small it seems.

A lot of times when we write a to do list, we don’t include things that we already naturally do. We don’t write down a doctor’s appointment we go to or the walk we took the dog on. But those things are requiring time out of our day and they count.

YOUR TO DO LIST

You will still have a to do list of all the things you want to do, but the truth is you are going to have to prioritize and some things may need to come off the list.

If there is something you already do consistently, give it a really hard look. It could be you’re doing it because it’s really important to you, such as daily movement or exercise. It helps you feel better and you probably want to continue doing that.

There may also be something that you do consistently that are not actually serving you well. It may be something you’ve just gotten in the habit of doing, but you actually don’t enjoy it very much, such as watching TV.

Those are the things you can maybe remove and will give you some free time for other things that are on your list.

PROCRASTINATION

If there’s something that’s been on your to do list and it keeps getting moved to the next day, and then the next week, and then the next month, that may be a natural procrastination.

Procrastination doesn’t mean you’re lazy. Often it’s because we don’t know what to do and that’s why it gets pushed to later and later on our to do list.

On the other hand, we may procrastinate and push things off because it actually isn’t that important. When you come to that realization, it’s okay to let that thing go, telling yourself it isn’t important or that it’s not a priority right now.

COMPETING GOALS

Another thing to look out for is to not set competing goals for yourself. There are so many things that we want to do and ways we want to improve and be better. It’s easy to unintentionally set ourselves up to be working against ourselves.

For example, you want to be in bed by 10:30 every night so you can get more sleep. You also want to wake up to a clean kitchen, so you have a goal of doing the dishes every night before bed.

Those are both great habits, but they also conflict with each other. If these are both brand new habits, you’re going to come to a point where you will have to choose one over the other. Doing both is not possible.

PRIORITIZE

You have to prioritize one over the other. Which one is more important right now? Which will make the bigger difference?

You can still try to do the second one, but you need a clear priority of which one is the main goal.

Don’t try to juggle everything at once. It’s hard and can be discouraging, but realize you are prioritizing the most important things and once you get a solid base built, you can add those other things.

NON-NEGOTIABLES

That foundation that everything else is being built on are your non-negotiables. Not everyone’s non-negotiables will be the same. We are all different with different needs and struggles and things we are naturally good at.

But figure out what those are for you. They don’t need to be complicated. Maybe there are just three things that really matter and if those three things get done, your day was a success.

Don’t worry about anything else that you may or may not accomplish. Trust that this is a season and it’s okay to focus only on those most important things.