Giving Yourself Grace in (Long!) Seasons of Transition with Kayse from Anchored Women

A day in Kayse’s life looks much different than it used to. Both of her  children are back in school after four years of being homeschooled.

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A day in Kayse’s life looks much different than it used to. Both of her children are back in school after four years of being homeschooled.

Kayse is up at 5:00, doing a very short morning routine, then helping the kids get together what they need for school before heading out the door at 7:00.

While the kids are in school she works, runs errands, and has a walking date with a friend twice a week.

After picking up the kids from school, Kayse switches to mom mode by making dinner, helping with homework, and all the other night time activities such as showers and bedtime.

THE HARDEST TRANSITION

The hardest part of this transition has been losing her morning routine. Previously the kids would get themselves up, making their own breakfast, ready to start school around 9:00-9:30.

Kayse still got up at 5:00, but had plenty of time to exercise, shower, and do her Bible study. Now she only has time to do one of those things before helping the kids pack up for school and getting out the door by 7:00.

GIVING IT ONE YEAR

It’s been several months and Kayse still doesn’t have it down, but she gave herself one year to adapt to this new transition. One thing that has helped is to lower her expectations and understand that this year is bringing a lot of changes.  

WORKING THROUGH THE CHALLENGES

There are definitely challenges, but they aren’t challenges that can’t be overcome. Actually, a lot of the challenges have been good for her children. They’ve grown in independence and are facing things they would not have faced while being homeschooled. They’ve also gotten involved in a lot more activities that they wouldn’t have otherwise.

Previously Kayse was feeling overwhelmed with balancing the home, homeschooling, running a business, and making time for relationships. During this transition season, she has been able to calm down and figure out what kind of mom and wife she wants to be.

SLOWING DOWN

Another thing they have learned during this season is what they want to say yes to and what they want to say no to in order to maintain the family culture they have built of having more downtime.

PURSUING PEACE

One of Kayse’s main goals is a ruthless pursuit of peace- for herself and for her family. She looks for ways to create a peaceful retreat in their home, creating peace in the sibling relationship, and finding peace in her marriage when they are going in two different directions every day.

MAKING THINGS EASIER

Kayse has taken some practical steps to make life easier. She preps almost all meals on the weekend. She also has theme days. Monday is chicken. Tuesday is tacos. Wednesday is breakfast. Thursday is pasta. Friday is pizza or burgers.

She isn’t trying to eliminate the challenges, but trying to find ways to be more efficient.

BATCH TASKING

One trick Kayse uses to make things more efficient is batch tasking, or having a theme for each day.

Mondays are planning and prep days. She does her planning and prepping anything that she didn’t get done over the weekend to make the week go more smoothly.

On Tuesdays she has her meetings, appointments, and interviews. Wednesdays are for writing.

Thursdays are her rest and catch-up days. Any work that is left over that needs to be completed is done this day. If everything is caught up, she takes that day to rest.

Fridays are for finances. She balances the budgets for home and work. And weekends are family time, protected from all work activities.

HAVING A FOCUS

Batch tasking helps Kayse stay focused on one thing without being distracted and jumping from one thing to another, and she gets so much more done.

It also relieves the stress of not completing a task because she knows that day will come around again the next week and she can finish it then.

GOAL SETTING DURING TRANSITION SEASONS

During this season of transition, Kayse has focused on one goal this year which is to make progress on her health and wellness. She has had to practice what she preaches which is focus on one thing at a time. Once it becomes second nature, then you can move on to another goal.

She has realized that if she only focuses on one goal and feels like she has made serious progress in an area that has always been hard for her, she’s going to feel great about that.

This means a lot of things have been put on the back burner and there are a lot of things she has had to say no to because they would take her focus off of her goal, which is taking priority right now.

UNDERSTANDING HER CAPACITY

In the past, Kayse has changed up her goal each month, but she realizes she doesn’t have the capacity to do that during this transition. This goal may become second nature after a year, but she is okay with it possibly taking two or three years.

As she has gotten older, she has accepted that she’s not superhuman and is already doing many things in her life by managing roles as a wife, mom, and business owner.

LESS STRESS & MORE PEACE

Kayse has struggled with feeling like she should be doing more in the time she has while her kids are in school. She was reminded by a friend that her time is distributed differently now.

 Where she could do things during the pockets of time she had during the day before, now they all need to be done during the window of time while her kids are in school.

She has gained peace by shifting her mindset to taking one day at a time, doing the best with it, and trusting God with the rest.

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